How to cope with the elephant in the room (Rejection)
+AI Agents Are Taking Sales Jobs But That’s Not the Whole Story
In 2016, I sat down at my desk for the first time as a new salesperson, filled with excitement. I had landed my first real job in a new city, and the opportunities were endless.
They told me I’d be great and trained me on the product and our ideal customer profile. I was at my desk, just having finished onboarding, when my manager gave me that nod of approval as he walked away. He said, “If you have any questions, let me know. Now start making some dials.”
About ten minutes and 47 calls later, my feelings of excitement had evaporated. The image that kept playing in my mind was of that cartoon where the character makes a call, a fist emerges from the phone, and then nails them right in the face.
I have never faced so much rejection, frankness, and rudeness in my life. I felt overwhelmed with doubt and fear.
At that moment I questioned everything, and if this job was the right place for me.
Perceived rejection can take you out if you leave it unchecked
I hear this sentiment repeatedly from new sellers. The rejection you face when cold-calling is massive, enough to eliminate many potentially great salespeople.
The question worth asking is why? Why is rejection so hard for us to deal with?
I read an article that was based on a study on rejection that was insightful. It outlines two types of social rejection:
Warmth Rejection
Competence Rejection.
Competence rejection is all too familiar for sales folks.
Competence rejection refers to a form of social exclusion or rejection that occurs when an individual perceives or experiences being dismissed, excluded, or devalued based on their perceived lack of skills, abilities, intelligence, or effectiveness in handling certain tasks or situations.
Sounds familiar?
The rejection that is received while cold calling is brutal, and it’s often conflated with one’s perceived value. If they don’t want what I’m offering, therefore I am not valuable.
This narrative plays in the mind. It played in mine. You must combat these thoughts at all costs, as they can often lead to a negative mindset.
Inadequacy
Self-esteem issues
Triggered anger
Separate who you are from what you do or sell. You are valuable, regardless of whether someone buys from you.
Travers mentions, “When one experiences competence rejection, it happens against their will and compromises their sense of control over their life experiences…”
Here are tools that can help you address rejection head-on
Our mind is a tricky thing, and sometimes it betrays us. Now that we are aware of how rejection is affecting our mood and mind it’s important to pause and do something about it before it becomes a larger issue.
Acknowledge the pain
Practice self-compassion
Challenge negative thoughts
Maintain perspective
Learn from the experience
To be a top sales professional you will have to do hard things. Enduring repeated rejection is one of the hardest. However, having the tools to deal with it will help you survive.
The next time you face rejection on the phone or elsewhere, pause and ask yourself the following:
What do I feel?
Why do I feel this way?
Is it true?
Is it absolutely true?
What would happen if the opposite occurred?
Many sales professionals are destroyed by rejection’s effect on confidence and self-efficacy. Don’t let it destroy you.
Take Out, To-Go
Before you check out…
I know sales professionals stay organized in the trenches, but sometimes we forget stuff. Often important “life” stuff, which is just as important.
I’ve partnered with to share some insights on a simple Apple Reminders productivity setup that may help you not forget as often. Check it out here.
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Until next time,
Tajh
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